Commonplace Book

'He was afraid of that fantasy, because he was aware of its lascivious furtiveness, and he was unsettled at the thought that such ideas might win ever greater mastery over him. But they overwhelmed him precisely when he imagined himself at his most serious and pure. As a reaction, it might be said, to the moments when he became aware of emotional realizations which were preparing themselves within him, but which were not yet appropriate to his age. For early in the development of every fine moral force there is such a point, when the soul weakens, and that will perhaps be its boldest moment - as though it must first put down searching roots in order to churn up the earth destined later to support it - which is why adolescent boys with great futures ahead of them possess a past rich in humiliations.'

from The Confusions of Young Torless by Robert Musil